Its keeps piling and piling.

I'm really clueless right now.

Sweety, can you please enlighten me..

Who am I to you? 

I know, I remember you say I'm your girl but,

why do I feel like you're paying more attention to her than me? 

Also, do you think she loves you more than I do? 

NO. 

Yes, I know you longer but that doesn't mean in a short period of time, she loves you more than me. 

I don't want my effort to find time for you to be a waste.

I don't want to know, when I'm chatting with you, you're chatting with two girls and that's me and her.

If you should know, I'm a hacker and hacking people's account is easy as ABC. 

Especially a certain someone's. 

So yeah, I kinda hack yours. 

How can I share my feelings and problems to you when I know, you don't give a fuck !?

And my teacher ask me if both of us could keep a low profile which I'm trying to do but those Form 3 idiots are making it harder. 

Don't you think by not talking to her will solve my problem. 

Actually, IT IS IF YOU DON'T KNOW. 

Plus, SHE KEEPS MAKING STATUSES SAYING SHE LOVES YOU.

That's had enough..

I'm done releasing my moments.. ADIEU :) 

Student Carnival :)

I was so happy during my first school carnival. 

I get to spend more time with him . 

Which is kinda rare... 

And I have to sacrifice my skin :'(

He kinda hug me well.. 

is holding one's waist consider as hugging? 

I 'll consider it as hugging. 

And in front of my friends we take pictures on my phone. 

I was like

'Oie2, ambik gambar' 

and he said 'okay~ later you mesti remember me oh~'

and then, Franz and the others decided to tease.

But I could care less. 

I love sitting close to him, holding his hand, ruffling his hair, pinching his cheeks and also saying Ily's to him .

All he wants to do on that day was making me his model. 

I was like .. NO.

He was kinda sad..

 making cute faces at me ..

a come on.. 

it was so damn freaking cute xD

so I only let one photo been taken ..

and then, we kinda walk around together.. but not close.. 

curse him and his long legs.. 

I have to walk fast to catch up with him -.-.. 

Aliah keep pestering me and my ninja to take pictures but we did lots and lots of time.. 

Sorry girl but I 'forgot' to tell ya ;)

Aliah and Afiq was so cute.

Ninja dude wants to cuddle but the moment he put his arm around me,

his friend, Afiq Mirza, said 

'Oie Meer, iboh mok ber-honeymoon ctok. nun gi asrama ompuan nun. korang buatla sepuas2 hati korang' 

and the others laugh.

if you guess our face was red, yes, it is. 

And his arm was no longer around me much to my dismay -.-.. 

And then, we stare at Aliah and Afiq. 

Ninja thought they were sleeping but I said no, they're cuddling. 

and then he ask, 

'Syu... pinjam paha.. mok jadi bantal'

and then I hit him.. 

My lap is for my future HUSBAND ...

I don't know if he is my jodoh or not.. 

And then, it was time to go back so I help him..

yeah.. me and lia didn't really do job during the carnival :D 

so hey, here's the photo :) 

this is actually our last photo of the day :P

Thank you lia for taking this picture. 

I love you for doing it. 

also,

I love you Asyraaf :) 

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

The truth.

I just can't shut my feelings now. 

The truth I'm about to say may hurt other people's feelings or what-shit but I don't care now. 

If you guys read this, 

please, do not tell him :'( 

There's this time where I help him with his Tumblr. 

He kinda give me the e-mail and password. 

So, I try it on facebook. 

Weather its valid or not. 

Its valid. 

That's when I read his messages..

I know! I'm a mean person. 

If he knows about this, 

He'll definitely hates me :'(..

Aigoo.. I'm crying now.. 

So I read his messages with Ba3sya, 

she's our best friend. 

Who is greatly inlove with Jared Leto. 

A pure Enchelon I must add. 

Did I spell that right? 

So yeah, I read it and I couldn't believe that he was so. . .

How can I put this.. 

I guess the right word is MUSHY :P 

Saying 'I miss her, she's mad at me, fuck my life! I make her cry!, where is she?'

Aww.. :') 

Darn, I can't stop crying now.. 

After I'm done his chat with  Tasha, 

I scroll down and read his chat with Azhar.. 

Which is kinda eww and eww and eww x(

Inggar nyawa ku baca. 

I never knew he was this perverted! 

But its alright because that teenage boys nature :)

Unless you're Yusri Liew...

So I skip reading it because there are so many colorful words I don't wish to know.. 

Then, I read his chat with Aliah's old profile..

That's when I realize that before we dated, he never like me.

Fuck! I'm crying a river now ._.

He said he had to layan me. He's not even willing. 

What girlfriend wouldn't cry!?

A bitch who already cheated millions of times. 

And I just read and read. 

The pain was bearable :')

Then, I read his chat with Aliah's new profile. 

Its getting nicer :D

So now I don't mind :)

After reading that, 

I read his chat with Yasmin. 

That chat makes me realize what a fool I was. 

He hated me from the beginning.. 

But when I ask him, he said that

He likes me before we met when we saw each other in a restaurant but didn't pay attention and  now he loves me.. 

I don't know which one to trust. 

I read again, then, 

There's a time where Yasmin make a status, trash talk about me. 

And he was actually on Yasmin's side. 

He even told Yasmin I got a boyfriend around September. 

That's bullshit dear. 

Mohd Azreeman was my best friend! 

Not boyfriend! 

You know I hate typing long words so i just put "bf"

Can't believe he misunderstood. 

Then, Yasmin told him to lie to me that he has a girlfriend name something something I don't even care. 

Then he said he doesn't want to lie to me. 

Well dear, you lied to me a lot already thank you very much.

It really hurts me.

The pain was unbearable but I just kept reading. 

Then, I read again and it was on September 17-20 I dunno but I know that's the date when we accidentally met in Parkson. 

He told Yasmin that he don't know what to do now. 

Yasmin ask what does he mean. 

He said to her that he really wants me to be his girlfriend. 

I was so shock when I read that part. 

Because I was the one who ask him ._.

So Yasmin said okay, 

I dunno what my feelings was when I read this part. 

Another part of me thinks I should break up with him.

Another part thinks I should just stick with him and act normal. 

So yeah, I chose the 2nd one. 

I can't let a guy like him go. 

I mean, I love him :')

And its like, 

he's the only guy who could make my heart beats fast, 

makes me nervous by just a single glance, 

makes me smile my true smile just by saying one sentence and also, 

the only one who manage to heal my wound heart :')

Oh Emeer Asyraaf , 

you taught me how to fall in love again. 

And I'm still crying. 

Pabo me ;P

Kbye peeps :)

p.s: Once you read this status, you are not allowed to tell a word to people. The only one you can is me. Allah see us from above and if you tell another soul, I hope Allah will  make you have a very unlucky year :)

 

I love you :)

 

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

My Questions, His Answers. His Questions, My Answers.

 Well. . 

Recently, I've been asking him so many questions that I thought but never dare to ask him.

Couldn't afford to hurt his feelings..

I guess I should start with his questions first. 

His Questions, My Answers. 

-Are you satisfied with my loyalty towards you?

-I told him sometimes yes and sometimes no. . 

Because, Its not fair that other people get to see him everyday while I have to search for him. 

-What's your biggest wish?

-It was my question actually but he ask so my answer is 'A day with you is all I ever wanted'.

Then he said he'll try his best to make my wish come true :')

-Will you ever turn back to your exes?

-NO I WILL NOT DEAR. If I still love my exes, I wouldn't be here with you.

In my head was, I love you too much to even think about other boys. 

-Do I look like a monkey?

-BHAHAHAHAHAH. Yes you do dear. But you are a cute monkey that belongs to me and only me. 

I was like LOL when I read this question. 

-What do you hate? Just in case for future dating.

-I can't eat seafood.

It has become my phobia.

-I hate being in crowded places/

-Don't put me under the sun for a long time or else I faint. 

He's asking what I hate because he wants to make sure I don't go PMS at him on our first date. 

HAHAHAHA. I pity that guy for having trouble maker me as a girlfriend.

My Questions, His Answers. 

Well. . 

I have more questions that he does.

I'm curious! Can't fight the urge to ask. . 

-If other boys treat me better than you, what would you do?

His answer is pretty long. 

-It lies in your heart. If you think other boys treats you better than me, I guess you have to leave me. 

And then, we fought. He lose, I win xD

-Really?! You don't like me saying your cute?!

-No lah. That's what people my age thinks. 

And then we fought again. He wins. But lucky me, I still get to say he's cute. 

Change the cute to handsome.

-If I cheated, you'll break up with me on the spot right? 

-Nope. I'll investigate first. Why?

I told him the story, and he say he'll be my Watson ^_^

-What is your biggest wish?

Technically, It was my question but he stole it. 

-Me? Just to be with you was all I ever wanted. . . 

Aww!! And I thought he wants to shake hands with Chonny. 

-Once you're bored of me, like other people said, you will leave me. . Is that true? 

-I will not leave you. 

Its short. But I believe him :]

 

-Ros is now single a few days ago. If she makes you have more time with her than me, will you fall for her and leave me?

 

-I won't cause I know your love is pure. Your love is all I need.

 

Aww. 

 

I guess that's it. 

 

I have this really cute photo of him and kyaaa!!

 

Its him hugging a star plushy!

 

His cousin took a photo of it and he doesn't know about it.. 

 

Sweety, if you read this, please do not eat me nor Yasmin. 

 

WE'RE INNOCENT :3

 

Wanna show you the photo but its my prize posession. 

 

Can't share. Well, don't want to actually. 

 

I'm Done.

 

Kbye :)

 

Mornight. 

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

Exam Week.

Hello. 

 

Today, I'm gonna talk about exam week.

 

Everybody has exams, including adults. 

 

Their exams is making a new project. 

 

If the project satisfied his/her boss, 

 

they got an A.

 

About my school Exam week is kinda different. 

 

We have this OMR paper with SMK Lutong sayings. 

 

Also our 'kertas kajang'.

 

Plus, we're not allowed to fall asleep.

 

Need to put our bags outside. 

 

Tables far away from each other. 

 

That is the 'during exam'.

 

After exams, 

 

We got our papers.

One wrong, rewrite one time or in my KH class cases, 

 

TEN.

 

Life, why are you so cruel.

But here's some tips to stay awake during exam. 

 

Bring sweet.

You can't sleep with the sweetness of the sweets in your mouth right?

Daydream. 

If you're finish, just pretend to study on one question. 

Like just staring at the question but in your head, 

you're in your own world. 

Those are my tips. 

Kbye then readers.

Wish me good luck so that I'll pass it. 

p.s: Good luck to people out there who's having a test this week too.

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

Smiling Wide right now!

 Must be wondering.. 

Why I'm smiling wide like a guy who has a new car.

Not really. 

Do boys smile wide having a new car? 

Back to my story!

I'm smiling from ear to ear is because finally!

MY GODDAMN BOYFRIEND DECIDED TO CALL

Which is kinda rare because. . .

Its always me doing the calling. 

But, its always him who do the texting. 

weird huh?

I like calling than texting by the way, 

Well. . 

I'm so happy now :'D

Ah life.. 

I love You! 

I'm done. 

Bye bye readers~

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

Yahooooooo!!

I'm so happy now!

Finally! Sweety talk to Luke-shit guy!

Maybe some of you don't know the stories.. 

Like this. 

My friend, Afrina, 

GIVES MY FUCKING PHONE NUMBER TO THIS LUKE-SHIT GUY!

and of course, 

I felt betrayed because as a friend, 

if you know your friend has a bf or gf,

and her 'admirer' wants his/her phone number. 

DON'T GIVE IT.

I nag her the whole afternoon when I found out. 

Then, this Luke-shit guy talk to me and ask me why I no answer his phone.

DUHH. My simcard is broken dude. 

SUCKS TO BE YOU!! HAHAHAHA. 

And then,  I told Asyraaf about it and well. . 

FINALLY! He talk to Luke and ask Luke nicely to back off!

And I thought my dream of kicking a boy's ass would come true.. 

Oh well, least he cared  ~

Guess what? 

Luke-shit back off! 

Alhamdullilah!

I'm done now. 

Bye bye reader :)

                                                                                                                                         Yours Truly,

                                                                                                                                

                                                                                                                                       b2utyful-locket

Being Understanding Hurts.

My family, friends and even him ever makes me disappointed but being stupid me,

I bottle up my feelings. 

I don't know why  I would bottle it up because volcano can erupt at any time right?

Well now my feeling is like a volcano wanting to erupt but couldn't.

I've ever seen him talking to a girl closer than how I used to talk to him.

(which I think is quite far)

Of course, jealousy is in me. 

My friend saw my expression and ask me what am I going to do?

I'll do nothing. 

Then she hits me. 

She knows about me and my bottle up feelings. 

She told me that it isn't good for me to bottle up my feelings. 

Well, what can I do?

I don't want to hurt his feelings by not letting him socialize with people.

I'm only a girlfriend.

Not his mom nor wife.

So I have no right to change his life. 

He's not mad about me socialize with boys. 

(except for Luke because he is a fucking pervert)

Well that's because I always told them I need to be far from them because I don't like

people being close to me.

Its uncomfortable.

The only time we're close was 

 when he gives me his first gift and when I ask him to hold my watch for me

when I play 'bola jaring'. 

I think its Net Ball in English. 

The others are when we only past each other, giving each other hi's goodbye's and smiles. 

No more no less. 

I wonder, 

What will happen if I couldn't bottle up my feelings? 

Would I cry?

Punch a person?

If my cousin who used to be close to me knows my condition, 

he'll help me to over come it. 

Like he always does but ever since both o us enter SMK life, we drift apart. 

my cousin at Kuching.

I wonder,

 Why I'm still willing to bottle up my feelings even when they hurt me so much.

Its like they think my understanding limits is unlimited. 

Well, you're wrong in that one. 

If I'm alone and I burst, 

I'll cry.

And if the person is in front of me,

 I'll tell you all the crap I think about you that is in my mind till

you cry me a river

And by that time, I show no mercy. 

Beware. 

I'm done. Bye Bye readers ^_^

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

Describing My Asyraaf

 He's real name is Emeer Asyraaf. 

Gonna be 16 on 20th June. Yes, his birthday is 2 months early from mine. 

He's a boy duhhh. 

MUFC till he died. He keeps saying that. But I'm not surprise, just jealous.

Cute monkey! But this friend of mine say he looks like a Chipmunk. 

He's taller than me.

Alhamdullilah!

His petnames that only I could call him with. 

Sorry but I don't like sharing him!

Sweety - Sweetheart - Monkey - Aap - Oppa

He sings in class but I never hear it before

I want to...

 Blood-type O. So he is the easy-going guy. 

Not easily jealous nor mad.

damn..

 Love beats especially Studio, DJ songs and Chonny!

he ever 'confess' his love for Chonny

♥  ♥  ♥

He's a fan of Manchester United. Not City.

How many times must I type that?

He likes to keep me in prison.

And hell yeah I love his prison! Feel safe there.

 We have the same allergies for some reason.

Weird right?

We're a couple that act like best buds.

Who cares? Its AWESOME

He calls me

Maduu - Syu - Syuha - Dongsaeng

He can be shy

Which is so cute!

Doesn't mind my PMS times..

He knows how to handle it

He knows I love him more than ChangJo.

Why can't he be jealous over ChangJo just ONCE?! 

Has so many fangirls at school.

Hard to cope up with them.  

♥  ♥  ♥

He knows me more than my friends.

Loves me for who I am, not because of my exterior. 

Keeps calling me cute even though 

I 'literally' destroy my face to know if he still stick with me

glad he does :') 

Really sweet :') 

He does makes me cry

 but I LOVE him too much. 

First gift was a steel Leaning Tower Of Pisa Keychain. 

straight from Italy! I like to say Pisa as PIZZA

Worries a lot when I say about my bowling injuries.

I'm not joking about my bowling injuries.

  Has ever planned our 'date' but I dunno where the official date happens. 

Wish it will be on our One Year Anniversary... 

♥  ♥  ♥

There's something about each other that make us attracted to one another. 

Asyraaf, if you read this, don't you dare say a word about it. 

The photo is when he was a kid. 

Aww! So cute!

 We really are a couple but act like best buds. 

My last post for tonight. 

Goodnight readers :)

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

I need tips!

Being me, I'm nervous, shy around my own boyfriend. Yes, I'm SHY.

Weird huh? I know. I can't help it! What did I do to get this type of nervous feelings Ya Allah?

Even looking at him and he looks back makes me nervous. But, if I look at him and he doesn't look back (not notice) I'm ok. 

I am such a weirdo -.- 

What can I do!? Love make me like this. 

♥  ♥  ♥

Also, I'm really extremely jealous when girls I don't know or know talk to him like, real close!

Girl~ He's mine. Back off. 

Oh how I wish I could say that but I couldn't because I don't like making people feel weird.

And I know if I say it, the girls will tell him and he feels weird like.

"Why do I have a posessive girlfriend?" he thought to himself and

That is a NO NO.

I don't mind if my friend Aliah talk to him because she has a boyfriend and she ever told me

"No one knows how much I love him" she said.

And I respect that. 

Back to my story. If girls ever like touch him 'not-so-accidentally' 

I'll break her arm. And I know how to do that. 

If he touch a girl 'not-so-accidentally' 

(which will never happen cause he is loyal ^^)

This calls for a break up. 

Yes. And immediate one too. 

I'm the type where one wrong is a goodbye. 

♥  ♥  ♥

I really need to stop this freaking jealousy of mine. 

but how? 

please comment if you wanna give me tips. 

also,

give me tips on 

HOW TO TALK TO YOUR BOYFRIEND WITHOUT FEELING AWKWARD

Thats all. Adios Amigos~

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket

So here's the thing.

1. Don't follow me if you want me to follow back. 
2. I'll only follow people I know.
3. Or sometimes people who has interesting posts. 
4. I rarely post stuff. Life at middle school is HARD.
5. My updates could be long or short. 
6. Don't be shy to comment. I don't mind.
7. Do you love kpop? 
8. Once you read my blogs and I have question, answer me. I don't mind a simple "Sorry I dunno".
9. If you're an asianfanfics user, I'll be happy to follow you back. (I have to know who you are first)
10. SMKL people, a few teachers has blogger so beware about what you post. 
    

I'M DONE. BUBBYE READERS. 

Yours Truly,

b2utyful-locket